My mind wanders, thinking what else could be out there for me. But I don't read anything that is especially troublesome or insurmountable. You guys need to pack up the kids to a relative and go on a cruise. One night a week, get a baby sitter and go on a date. We go to ball games, plays, drives in the mountains, shopping, movies, out to eat, or just send the kids somewhere and have a wild sexy time at home.

I think, well, I am still relatively young (30), attractive, somewhat accomplished, smart, likeable ... This relationship is not meeting my needs or expectations. Sounds like you need to speak to a sound and responsible professional. Start talking and try having some adventures together. Remember though, nothing changes if YOU don't make it happen.

A month later he went to disneyland with the whole family, and then took a week off work to spend with his wife.

Well in the situation you describe there simply isn't THAT much time for big romance.

Kids (love 'em to death, but) get in the way of this. It's funny how some men think that the sum total of their involvement in a marriage or relationship is, "Well, I'm here, aren't I?

I was very excited at first, thinking this would spell the end of the doldrums our marriage has become.

I hoped this would decrease the time we spent discussing baby food and diapers and what's for dinner and how much gas costs and did you get the mail and mess like that. We still don't do anything, go anywhere, talk about anything of consequence on a personal level.

However I think you should stick it out, bear in mind you chose to have the 'married w/ kids' lifestyle. I feel much less respect for people who do this, why take the vow in the first place? Among the four different friends I know who have been married for more than a couple years, they all share one thing in common: They have MAJOR PROBLEMS.

Either they don't talk, or they fight constantly, or the kids and stress are ripping them up...

After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads. I'm not exactly sure what I'm on the verge of; it could be none, one or all of the above. It was a cycle that became demoralizing, boring and led to what I perceive as an incredibly unbalanced life. Throughout that time, mmy husband and I's relationship began deteriorating. I would look at sites like Marriage Builders for tips.

I've been married to my husband for nearly five years; we've known each other for 10. I would pull up articles written by marriage and family therapists to see what we could do.

If you wait for your husband to figure things out, you could be waiting forever. Except it went on like that a lot longer than in your situation.