Knowing that I would happily run my tongue along the inside of the fire pit before going out with him again, I politely declined. Google “Furries.” -Mark I will neither confirm nor deny that any of these are my own experiences that I slapped someone else’s name on, so as not to sully my image as a perceived dating authority.As I opened my car door and got in, he threw the two CD’s into my car and ran away. When I got home, I asked him for his address and I mailed them back to him. Everything was going perfectly until she wanted me to put on an adult sized animal suit and I laughed because I thought she was joking. Speaking of slapping someone else’s name on it, you may also notice that your story is attributed to a name that isn’t yours. Last week, I daydreamt a disgruntled individual jumping out of the bushes near my house, Scarface style, because I took a cheap shot at his masculinity.It didn’t take long for me to discover that she didn’t speak English either. Mind you, the profile of the beautiful woman that I thought I was meeting was in perfect English!

On my way out, I was yanked aside for questioning by police officers on suspicion of prostitution.

Flushed and wasted, with my panties stuffed in my coat pocket, I did my best to explain that I was just talkingwith my "friend" in the bathroom.

Then he spent 20 minutes describing how bad one of his former online dates' vagina smelled. It was awful." "I met this sexy guy on Plenty Of Fish and he started asking me what shoe size I was and what color my toenails were painted. When we got to the party I told him I had to use the restroom and I'd meet up with him later.

So I asked him if he had a foot fetish, and he was like, 'Any normal man wants his woman to have nice feet.' Then a couple days later he brought up my feet again, and I told him I just didn't see a future for us. Then I ran into some friends and was chatting with them and kind of lost track of time.

When the check came, I was relieved to end what I thought was the worst dating experience of my life. She stopped in front of me, pointed to herself, and said the name of the woman that I was supposed to meet.

After I was finally able to wrap my head around the bait & switch advertising, I decided to be a good sport and I asked her if she’d like to go sit down at the table I’d reserved.

"My OK Cupid date was a college senior home for break.

I was the one who drunkenly suggested having sex in a public bathroom.

After we started talking, it was clear that he had already been drinking, and then he had four more glasses of wine before our meal even arrived.